Elysium Synopsis

It’s the year 2154, and white people have fled Earth for the space station Elysium, leaving the desolated planet almost exclusively populated by racial stereotypes. As the only white man left on Earth, it’s up to Matt Damon (Matt Damon) to save these criminal degenerates from their own debauchery, in the latest unintentionally racist and contradictory blockbuster from dim-witted director, Neill Blomkamp.

Matt Damon

Matt Damon as Matt Damon

Matt Damon plays Matt Damon, an honest factory worker who struggles daily to stay on the right side of the tracks as he is tempted by the local Meheecans to drink tequila and steal cars. After being exposed to deadly radiation and discovering he only has days to live, he becomes determined to lead the racial stereotypes to Elysium, because, as we learnt from District 9 (dir. Blomkamp, 2009), a cause is only worth fighting for selfish reasons.

Spider Djon as Spider Djon

Spider Dijon as Spider Dijon

Standing in Matt Damon’s way is Elysium’s secretary of defence, Tallulah Starling (Jodie Foster), who plans to reboot the space station’s computer system so it forgets who the president is and she can make herself president; because that’s how political revolution happens (I’m not even exaggerating that bit!). Along the way, Matt Damon is aided by criminal leader and racial stereotype, Spider Dijon (Spider Dijon), and his gang of racist stereotypes, but faces opposition from a banal military man, known only as, Military Man (Military Man). Not the same one as in District 9, but played by the main guy from that film, and you liked that film, so, WHOO!

Military Man as Military Man

Military Man as Military Man

More Neill Blomkamp!

District 9 





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